Life Lessons from a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu tournament

The last week of my life involved total immersion in twice daily Brazilian Jiu Jitsu (BJJ) training and getting ready for my first tournament (Copa de Bangkok). This whole competition prep was to take place in just over one week, which could be classed as stupid or brave or possibly both, but I learnt more about myself, others, the sport and sportsmanship in one week than I could possibly imagine. 

I certainly will not be waxing lyrical about the technicalities of BJJ because my knowledge of this and the points scoring is virtually non-existent. To cut a very long story short; I lost my fight on points to a competitor with 2 years experience, gained a bronze medal and found my human spirit again. Shared experiences and connection are so vital to human health and happiness and this was found in abundance; during hours spent training and travelling to Bangkok either sharing a bus seat or a bunked youth hostel room with 20 other male fighters. 

For me, this experience was a personal initiation test that could only have been a success just by taking part. Although I'm brand new to grappling, my journey with martial arts is not new, but a head  injury from a concussion combined with dehydration stopped my Muay Thai fighting dead in it's tracks about 5 years ago and I had always assumed I would never be able to go back. It seems you can; it also seems you can never truly leave it behind because the lessons it teaches you are so deeply entrenched. These are a just a few things I took away from a week in a completely new setting and sport. 

1. Creating a positive gym vibe

When I asked to compete in the BJJ tournament, I had a total of 1 "no-gi" session and had never worn a gi (the BJJ uniform) before. I was greeted with the biggest of smiles from an excellent man; Prof Olavo Abreu, who was so encouraging and relaxed about the whole thing. I haven't encountered heart, passion and enthusiasm like this in a long time and this was extended to the most beginner of beginners (me) right through to the best of the best. There is a zero tolerance for purposeful malicious intent in the gym I trained in (Phuket Top Team), made possible by good instructors and that, I think is vital for creating a good training environment. I don't know enough about the sport to comment on whether that is a trait common to it or not, but observing this etiquette at the tournament throughout pretty much all competitors, I can assume good sportsmanship is embedded in the training philosophy. 
The effect of training in a positive environment is also extremely infectious and motivating. People helping each other and trying to get the best from themselves and those around them really aligns with my values and beliefs about the essence of sport and it is so lovely to see this act out in a real way that is beyond dreamy idealism. 

2. Creating a positive team

This then leads intuitively on from the previous point to creating a positive team. I am a very solitary person so to travel and train intensely with people even for a week was an onslaught to my senses. In training and competing, your body and soul is laid bare for all to see - literally. In the grappling sports, there is no room for shyness! But to travel with 20 men, factor in some serious Bangkok bus sleep deprivation and pre competition nerves is a serious test to "group" character and this was immense. I haven't had so much fun in a long time; the group dynamic was impressive, positive, relaxed, serious, caring and compassionate all at the same time. There were win's and losses in our group but everybody conducted themselves and helped others in a way that was seriously inspiring and a demonstration of the true human spirit. No arrogance or sulking at any time. 

3. You cannot train for competition

You absolutely can't train for competition and so this experience is invaluable. Female fights is slightly more tricky in martial arts and especially here in Thailand so you take what there is but ideally matching the skill level and opponent can really make an experience good (or bad). In the end however, competition is about preparing for uncertainty and that's why it is such a good lesson about humility. Everyone is beatable - two hands, two legs, same weight - everybody can win and lose. My personal experience is taking amateur or inter club level competitions early on is a good way to progress and to learn about competition as there just isn't any other way to prepare. You can't train for the nerves, adrenaline, fatigue and how that will work for multiple bouts. I was nervous, especially after watching two hours of competitions beforehand which is something I never would have done for Muay Thai. By the time I came for my fight I was a stoic mess of fatigue, but I was also pleased to note that the fighting instinct never leaves you and that is something I needed to know after years of not fighting. I still have that fire in my belly for a "fisticuff"; I also know that strength will not beat skill in BJJ! Something that was rather nice to see. I like to be humbled and strength is something I have a lot of, so I rely on it a lot - but it can only take you so far in this sport. I was also knackered after just one 5 min bout - "note to self" - pacing! 

4. Transferrable skills

The lessons that martial arts teaches you are usually centred around: humility, sportsmanship, work ethic, discipline, courage etc. I was lucky I had someone patient enough to show me this through action over a number of years. I'm also grateful that those lessons once learnt don't leave your side and I found that this "inside-out" approach to training can then be used in a whole manner of things. I used this approach in bodybuilding training for my first show (Figure) and it became a "constructive" process to my character rather than a "destructive" one and I wonder if without this grounding in  martials arts philosophy whether the outcome would have been very different. I also believe, the combination of training, competition and a skilled coach/mentor can coax these traits out in almost anybody. 

5. Meditation for focus, recovery and information retention

I started to use meditation and mindfulness as above, whilst I was prepping for my first figure bodybuilding competition as I needed this element to balance out the ethos of the sport. It has proved invaluable to getting the best out of myself (and others) by improving focus, self-motivation and building a really robust mind set. I found 10 mins of meditation and breathing before BJJ class really helped deal with information overload from learning new techniques every day. It also helped hugely in dealing with competition nerves in a completely different setting and situation, with no close friend anywhere in sight. It also helps with recovery as you learn mastery over emotion and staying calm is a huge part of this. Being able to detach from emotion and release tension is hugely underrated in the recovery process. 

A final note

I've come to this sport a little older now, a little wiser (I like to think) with the ability to train smarter. I also have a whole catalog of mental skills I didn't have years ago which made my coping mechanism of a potentially very stressful situation nothing but huge fun and enjoyment. I wasn't just a little out my comfort zone but hugely out of it and being calm amongst uncertainty is one of the ways to enjoy life, as that is the only certainty we have - we don't and won't ever know how the story tells itself. Competition is an excellent way of learning to deal with that and transfers to all other areas of life. Being around positive passionate people was the biggest and most inspiring lesson for me. This is so vital for doing anything ambitious because it is just really hard on your own. Being vulnerable and strong are compatible and necessary, and understanding the place for both is part of this journey. Being appropriately out of one's comfort zone will usually be accompanied by personal growth but knowing how and what you need to grow are also part of this lesson. The team made my experience one which I won't forget and one which has been lacking in my life for a long time. You can be alone and connected which is not the same as being alone and disconnected and that is my lesson learnt. A very nice one. Thank-you to all involved.